The 3 keys to effectively dealing with emotional+physical pain

Emotional and physical pain are inevitable.
Suffering is optional.

(or so the Buddha said)

(and Eve says so, too!)

If you follow me on instagram and have been reading my posts you already know Yin Yoga and mindfulness meditation transformed my life- primarily by giving me relief from chronic pain (and the accompanying emotional pain). 
Today I'm sharing with you three tools I learned from yin yoga + meditation that contributed greatly to my healing. 

Here are three keys to effectively dealing with emotional and physical pain:

1. Observe emotional and physical pain with curiosity and kindness.

   • Through mindfulness meditation you can learn to connect with the wise, curious and kind part of yourself that is able to observe your experience without judgment. 

     • Yin yoga is a fantastic opportunity to practice connecting with this part of yourself while experiencing discomfort so that when you experience discomfort or pain when you're off the mat you are better prepared to handle it. 

2. Consciously relax the body when experiencing emotional and physical pain (the pelvic floor in particular!)

   • Next time you are experiencing physical or emotional pain or discomfort notice what happens to your body. Most of us will find that the whole body tightens as a way to protect itself. Sometimes we truly do need to protect ourselves but often this is only creating more pain. Consciously relaxing the body while experiencing pain can help you to integrate and process the experience in a way that minimizes the possibility of trauma and minimizes the possibility that the pain will linger in your body. 

     • The pelvic floor is the only part of the body that when you relax it the rest of the body follows suit! The same cannot be said for relaxing the shoulders, the jaw or any other body part! 

       • All of this is easier said than done which is why it takes practice! In yin yoga we can practice relaxing the body while experiencing discomfort.

3. Take it one breath at a time! 

   • You'll be amazed at what you can withstand when you take it one breath at a time. 

     • When you wonder how long something is going to last...like...the pain of a heartbreak...or...the pain of a sprained ankle...your suffering is exacerbated. Pain is amplified as you project it into the future and get lost in fantasies of how the pain is going to impact your life. 

       • In yin yoga we learn that the pose becomes increasingly uncomfortable the more we wonder how long it's going to last.

         • The pose becomes increasingly more comfortable when you focus solely on the present moment by taking the experience of the pose one breath at a time. 

In this week’s mini yin practice I’m contemplating the “powerful unbounded consciousness” that I am. As I practice I visualize softening the boundary of skin and flesh that “separates” me from all that is. I allow my mind to soften along with my skin, my muscles, my ego. As I allow all this to melt my breath is allowed more room to expand and my spirit to expand with it. I am not “trying” to expand, but allowing it to be as powerful and unbounded as it is.

Shoelace: this pose can be quite intense in that it creates a lot of sensation in the hips. The knees are meant to be stacked one on top of the other but if this is too uncomfortable feel free to place a block/blanket between the knees or outstretch and straighten the bottom leg so only the top leg is bent. Breeaaaathe deeply in this pose. Continuously remind yourself to soften your face. Often the pleasure in this pose is in the release! Stay upright for 3-5 minutes or begin to fold forward after a minute if it feels good in your body.
When you release this pose you might feel creaky and achey. Take your time as you outstretch your legs, lean into your hands and let yourself feel the echo of the pose in your body.

Melting Heart: If hanging out here feels uncomfortable you might like to try this with a prop under your elbows/triceps! Inhale expansive energy through the crown of your head, exhale limiting beliefs through the heart center. 

Bridge: In the image the block is at the highest setting but you could even try this with a couple of pillows under your sacrum for a more restorative version. What is your relationship to having your heart open and vulnerable? Do you feel better able to allow the heart to be open when the back feels supported? As you lie here, with each exhale can you soften your resistance to allowing the front body and the heart to open?

Legs up/snail: Lie here and contemplate the existence of your toes! If it feels good in your body you can drop your legs straight back behind your head into Snail pose (or what you might know as Plow Pose) either keeping you legs straight, or bending them and bringing the knees to the ears. 

Always take several breaths between each pose to rest+feel

This sequence begins with 3 forward folds for encouraging introversion and focus. 

Hold each pose for 3-5 minutes. 

1. Caterpillar: unlike your classic seated forward fold make sure your feet are not flexed and the muscles in the legs are relaxed. USE AS MANY PROPS AS NEEDED! Sit on a blanket/cushion. Place blocks/bolster/blanket under knees. Place a bolster/pillows on your legs to support your torso. Prop up your head with fists. As you rest here you might imagine thoughts draining out of your forehead as you allow the earth to absorb them. After 3-5 minutes slowly release the pose by bringing your hands behind you to prop yourself up. Sit & feel the echo of the pose in your body.

2. Butterfly: Same rules apply here: make sure you support yourself as much as necessary. If you find it hurts to have your knees bent in this way make sure you place something underneath. Now that you have dropped in to your body with caterpillar you might be ready to begin shifting into the “flow” phase. Connect with a sense of flow in your body. Even if you do not feel any flow you can encourage it by deepening your breath and/or visualizing that the sensations you feel are flowing through your entire body instead of remaining stagnant. 

3. Sleeping Swan: (aka pigeon). This pose often stirs up a lot of sensation. Can you take a step back from the sensation and observe it without judgement? Notice the ebb&flow of sensation&breath. In this pose practice cultivating your ability to witness your experience without reacting. Even when you have a desire to move can you observe the sensation and just let that be? (if you have a desire to move because you are in pain- please move!)

4. Supported Side Bend: in this pose you place a bolster/pillows under the side of the torso underneath the armpit. You can have the knees bent or straight. The arms can be alongside the ears if comfortable. After a minute or so you might keep the knees/legs where they are as you roll on to your back into a supine twist. This is the pose to “let go”. To let yourself be. Allow. Surrender. Nothing to do but just be. 

Taking 20 minutes to do this could totally turn your day around! Let me know if you try it!

Allot about 20 minutes for this sequence. No props needed!

Hold each pose for 3-5 minutes. (Insight Timer is a wonderful app with tibetan bowl sounds for the alarm instead of the harsher alarm sounds that come with our phones.)

1. CHILDS POSE: knees as wide as feels comfortable, big toes together, arms extended but remember to allow the muscles to be passive! If too much weight is in your knees when you bring your forehead to the floor bring something under your forehead so the weight goes back towards your heels.
2. SPHINX: if you have tight neck and shoulders this pose can be uncomfortable at first but stick with it! See what it’s like to just be supported by your bones and let the muscles “melt”.

3. HALF FROG: take just 1 minute on each side to give your lower back a break after all that compression from Sphinx pose!
4. STIRRUP: for those of you who have done Happy Baby in a yoga class you might be surprised at how holding Stirrup for a few minutes can be a bit uncomfortable. What is it like to breathe into the discomfort? (note: do not breathe into pain! If it’s pain just let the pose go/back off. Discomfort is different than pain!) Between the poses take a minute to just breathe and feel the echo of the pose in your body. 

I heard someone say once that Yin yoga is a bitter practice with a sweet result (was it Bernie Clarke who said this?). Some of the poses can be very pleasurable when holding them, but more often than not the real pleasure comes from the release. 

PRANAYAMA FOR LETTING GO:

To deepen the experience of letting go of the old to make room for the new add some breath and a visualization to your Yin practice! This breath works especially well in Childs Pose and Sphinx. 
1. as you inhale imagine drawing the breath in through the crown of your head and visualize the breath/energy moving down your back all the way to the base of the spine. 
2. as you exhale visualize the breath/energy moving back up your spine and pouring out of your heart (or you might visualize it pouring out of your chest)
3. Continue like this or add the visual of drawing into your body on the inhale what you would like to draw into your life and on the exhale releasing what you would like to get rid of. 

note: illustrations are a collaboration between me and my mom but most of the credit goes to her

A post holiday rest

Part 1

Whether you’ve gone to your parents home, someone else’s home, are hosting, or have even fully escaped social activities over the holidays take 20 minutes to drop all thoughts of a to-do list, to-bake list, conversation topics to avoid list, haunting memories of holidays past list, naughty or nice list, and take a respite that’s just for you. 

If all your holiday celebrations are over this could be a particularly nice time to rest, reflect, and let everything settle.

If you have a yoga bolster + blocks- awesome! If not- grab a few pillows and a blanket, find a cozy corner, light some candles, and let’s get to relaxing! 

For a little info on yin yoga check out my last post. 

—Hold each pose between 3-5 minutes. You can set a timer. I’d recommend the app Insight Timer for having pleasant sounding tibetan bells as your alarm. 

—make sure you are comfortable enough to hold the pose for a few minutes, but that you still have just enough sensation to keep it interesting. Only move if there is pain or your body invites you to go deeper. 

—As you hold the pose focus on breathing, softening the body, softening the mind, and surrendering the body to gravity as you allow yourself to rest on the earth and on the props. 

—Scan the body for your habitual holding patterns (where you normally hold your tension)—the usual culprits are the jaw, the space between the brows, neck, shoulders, and hips. In yin yoga we don’t contract the muscles. See how much you can let go and just be supported by your bones. 

YIN POSES

Pause in a seated kneeling position for about a minute between each pose to bring your spine back to neutral and feel the echo of the pose in your body. 

1. Dragonfly 

2. Saddle 

3. Supported fish (knees bent and knocked together or legs straight. Bolster length wise under spine, or blocks, or pillows/folded blanket)

4. Twisted Roots (reclined twist).

What is Yin Yoga?

In the future I will go even more in depth into Yin yoga but for now here is what you need to know:

• Yin yoga has its roots not only in the yogic practices from India but also in Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) and Taoist yoga. Just like TCM uses acupuncture to help unblock Qi/energy by inserting needles along meridian lines (channels in the body through which energy flows)  the practice of yin yoga unblocks energy by applying pressure to those same meridian lines. (If you’re familiar with yogic “nadis”, meridians are essentially the same thing). 

• Yin yoga accesses the fascia, connective tissues, tendons, and ligaments instead of the muscles (which we access in yang yoga styles like vinyasa). We do this by entering the poses without warming up and holding the pose for 3-5 minutes which is the amount of time it takes to rehydrate the connective tissues and restore flexibility. 

• In the 3-5 minutes we hold the pose we only move if we are in pain and need to modify or if the body begins to open up and allows us to sink more deeply into the pose. Otherwise we find stillness and surrender. In Yin yoga we have the opportunity to allow, accept, and be (as opposed to do). 

• Sometimes when we come out of a yin pose we feel a bit stiff and achey- this is normal. Exit the pose slowly and take a minute to just sit and feel the effects of the pose. 

 A COUPLE OF MY THOUGHTS ON YIN YOGA…

1. People who practice yoga often talk about having an experience of a “yoga high” after practicing and I have to say that the particular yoga high I experience after a yin yoga class is what really got me hooked on this approach to yoga. 

2. After ten years of trying different meditation techniques I finally figured out how to approach meditation after diving deep into yin yoga. Yin yoga taught me how to be with discomfort and observe my experience without needing to change it. This profoundly shifted my meditation practice, and my whole life. 

Have you tried yin yoga? what did you think? 

Stay tuned for the first in my 20 minute self care series!!